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« PHYSICIANS IN FICTION: Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert | Main | AM I A NEW ENGLANDER NOW? »

May 18, 2005

Comments

jcwinnie

Well, if we are supposed to guess the access code, then spelling out WENDYSCHILI probably is too many numbers, eh?

Gratisgab

What was your first time in there like? Your account shows that you don't really bat an eyelid in there now....it's so routine for you - the transition from the so-alive upstairs to the basement.

The organs are wrapped in paper and then put in formalin? Wonder why..? Isn't formalin a solution (a mix of formaldehyde gas and water and methyl alcohol) if I recollect correctly from my 12th standard Chemistry..?

Ingrid

Heh. Great story Madhu. Thanks. I've blogged it :)

P.S. I am still trying to visualise that L shaped door.

Ingrid

Sorry Madhu, I misread the line. The room is L-shaped, not the door. I should have read your post again before commenting. You wrote the story so well, it was like walking into the room with you. You don't miss anything. Love your observation skills and attention to detail. The contrast between floors reminds me a little of attending daytime cinema in London's West End. After a few hours of concentration in a hushed darkened environment, you step out into daylight and the bustle of daily life. Sort of like stepping from one world into another.

LMF

I attended a couple of autopsies recently after a long time. It always amazes me that pathologists and morgue attendants are so matter-of-fact about what they do.
A couple of suggestions for your story. One is to remove the parentheses where you explain about the family choosing to have the organs removed. Or else, make the explanation come out during the conversation with the resident ("I'm glad the family gave permission for us to keep the organs, we always get a better look that way"). The second is to add an element of reflection - if the MI had not gotten him, the cancer would have, wonder what he looked like, what his life was like, in the end this is what his life was reduced to - a few organs in a formalin bucket. I realize that some of these are cliched but may still work for the story. Or else, introduce a contrast with something mundane - for example, the pathologist goes from the morgue to eating lunch, or picking up her kid from school. For the lay person and for many doctors, it will be interesting to get a glimpse of the ease with which pathologists transition from the activity in the morgue to routine daily activities.

MD

jcwinnie: you are a riot. I am laughing as I type this...

gratisgab: you smartie, knowing what formalin is and all. I'd have to look it up again if a resident asked me. Sometimes I think there is only so much room in my brain and when I learn new things, the old ones fall out...

ingrid: you sweetie. I just wondered if the sentence made sense. Thanks for the bloggy blog. I love your descriptions - coming out of a silent West End theater into the crowded street. I read so many British authors that I feel I know this place that I've never actually been....

LMF: excellent suggestions. Have made changes to the story as you indicated. I think it is much better this way.

Gratisgab

Love the changes. I really think this is your best one to date.

susan

Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I couldn't stop reading this. I linked to your site and then wondered
(when the page went private yesterday) if you'd rather I didn't. Regardless, it's a great story.

MD

susan! Thanks so much. No, I was just playing around with the site yesterday and changing things, and when I do that I sometimes take the site 'off-line' as it were!

I am always tickled pink when anyone wants to link to this thing: somehow I can never really believe anyone is reading it....

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